well, email to be specific. I received an offer letter from one of the most talented photographers in the world, Yamashimanda. Obviously, I was ecstatic after reading the first few lines of his mail, offering me his assistant job. But my smile faded as I got to the remaining portion. The bad news was that only food, accommodation, and stipend were included in the package which meant, I have to take the ticket fare and visa charges. That was beyond what I could arrange on short notice. After much hesitation, upon her compulsion, I informed my dad. As expected I received "If you want to go, then go. But never come back and we are not going to support you in this absurdity." After the phone call, I was happy that it turned out exactly how I expected it to be but shahana was murmuring something like “heart...stone...how can he…” which clearly suggested she was upset.
On getting the news, every one of my friends-by this I
mean people who actually care about my existence and dream not my help or
money- pitched in what they can and messaged me the interest rate they were
expecting. Around the time to pay, I was just a few rupees short and as I was
brainstorming a way, BK informed me that shahana took care of it and she wanted
me to know that it was from her savings. And after much hesitation, he added
that don't lose shahana because actually, she went out on a limp to help me by
selling one of a pair of her earrings which she declared lost to her family,
and made him promise not to tell me. I just sat there thinking what did I ever
do to have such people in life and realized I do have a really supportive
family and I'm not that blessed.
Shahana was actually an angel when it came to making
lists and shopping. I would have bought whatever rag that was on display if it wasn’t
for her. She always managed to keep a smiling face and cheered me up whenever I
felt like I’m making a mistake taking this offer. My heart ached every time she
was close. I wasn’t ready to move away from her, even if it was temporary.
Occasionally I caught her staring at absolutely nothing, lost in thought… I
guessed she wasn’t all ok with my plans even though she was totally happy for
me.
It was hard to keep a smiling face when BK and Shahana
hugged me goodbye at the airport. I
wasn't ready to be away from her and it bothered me enough to let me think of
not boarding the flight. As I waved them goodbye after checking in, shahana had
the same face that she had, when she stood near me, watching me saying goodbye
to my friends on a group call. She sure was internally battling with the
perfect goodbye, but there was something more to that face and my mind wasn’t
at all ready to stop thinking of what she had in her mind.
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