Language of Love Part 12

 

"Well, in reality, she didn't even care about me, she had a better boyfriend, and was kind of cheating both of us at the same time. As it should be, I was so devastated when I found out that she was cheating on me. I had already introduced her to my family and you can guess the problems that might have followed. It was a complete mess. After her, relationships were disastrous chapters. I never got that comfort and attachment from anyone. I tried…but ended up hurting the person on the opposite side."

“Ok…so the origin of your misery is that she cheated you”

"If you say so. I'm actually grateful that, I met her and fell in love. If it wasn't for her, I wouldn't have had the confidence to trust my potential and the courage to follow my passion. Everything happens for a reason I guess."

Shahana looked at me not being able to let that all sink in. Even I was in shock realizing the emotions I had for her. I avoided her eyes and was confused as I saw the sea in front of me. Like always, thinking about her made me skip a few episodes of the real world and here I'm. I sighed and followed her to the sea, settling down in the sand as she enjoyed the soft touch of the blue monster.

“You know, unless you have any plans to build a time machine, you should move on. Or else will miss many beautiful moments in life. Life is really short than we think.”

I nodded to her words and looked at the waves as if they were some medicine for my pain.

“Ice cream" she shouted at me before I was lost in my thoughts, seeing an ice cream store nearby.

“No, thank you. I don’t like ice cream “

“Oh. Ok alien”

I sniggered “Why?”

“Who on earth hates ice cream?”

“I also hate chocolates and sweets, and prefer snacks and juice over them”

“You are the strangest guy I ever met”

“what about you then?”

“I usually go with Veg foods and sweets"

"Oh, I don't consider that living.  I love non-veg foods and won't stop until my stomach stares at me with pity eyes."

"That's exactly how my dad puts it.  Oh, you should come home sometime. My dad is a fantastic cook. He can't eat much due to health issues, but still, he tries on different varieties and would love someone who appreciates non-veg."

“And still you don’t eat!!! Ok Ms.Alien”

 “Haha. I do taste them. But just so that he will be happy.”

"Oh, I'm jealous of you now. I can barely cook what I like and you are served everything I like. Hah. Life."

“Don’t be Mr. Alien. I will_”

She stopped in the middle as her phone rang.

‘Hi Dad’

Oh, speak of the devil. I smiled at the coincidence.

“Shinu, what is this place called?”

“Snehatheeram”

‘Snehatheeram Dad.’

‘Yah. I think so.’ ‘Ok…will leave immediately dad. See you.’

"Ok Mr. Alien, I have to leave now. Cousins are home and it's time that I fake some emotions.

"After you Ms." I gestured for her to walk first

“Oh so aliens do know manners. I’m delighted”

I accepted defeat and just laughed.

 

I was knee-deep in sorting my things when her text popped into my phone.

‘So, what’s tomorrow?’

I decided to take a break and sat on the pile of clothes I had to fold.

'Going out for a few days. Work is calling '

‘Ok’

‘Okeyyy…’

‘Arggh… I can’t sit in this house for even half a day tolerating relatives.’

'So angry and sad '

‘Desperate to be with nature actually’

‘I wish I could, but can’t take you with the team’

'It's ok. let me know when we can go out ok'

'Ok now go and pack. See you later

'Bye'

I laid down on the clothes, thinking how amazing it would be to take her with me.

A sharp knock on my door pulled me up from the position. I could hear footsteps walking away.

Dad.

Ever since I decided to disobey him, that’s how I get called for dinner. My achievements never softened his heart. He always looked at me with the same disappointment in his eyes. I sighed at my fate and laid back on the clothes.

The shoot was far more boring and lengthy than I expected. Like always, I came home past midnight, hungry and tired. I let myself inside using the spare key, only to find empty food containers on the dining table. I immediately regretted not calling mom to say I will be back today. With nothing other than vegetables in the fridge, I decided to go out and eat. I went up to my room, dumped my bags, and called my late-night partner. BK answered within a ring, implying that he was up.

‘Hei…Out?’

‘Temple’

'Ok' I put the phone back into my pocket and left it in my mom's scooter.

He was already there, waiting, with food in his hand. The shop was our lifeline for 'midnight emergencies' ever since we learned to sneak out of our homes. I gave him a half hug and devoured the food he held. When my hunger subsided, we started talking.

BK was into photography and was pretty good at too. But he gave up on his dreams as life demanded a stable job. My worst fear will always be to end up like him.

In the middle of our conversation, my phone blinked and I took it in haste realizing its shahana.

‘Back home?’

‘Yeah’

‘So a good night’s sleep and a movie tomorrow!!’

'Right now at a teashop nearby and don't know when I will be back home '

‘At this time!!’

‘Yah, with BK’

She didn’t respond further.

‘any problem’

‘nope’

‘sure?’

'Yeah just give me a call when you are free '

‘Done’

When I kept my phone down, BK was looking at me with a ‘care to explain?’ expression.

“It’s shahana"

“You never even cared if your inbox displayed 100+ unread messages, so I guessed that much.”

I just smiled awkwardly at his comment and silently ate. As he understood I don't want to talk about it, he continued the conversation.

"As I was saying, I really want to be out there taking photos for a living and with the life, I'm living right now, I have locked my camera in a bureau so that I won't break it in anger. I hate this life man" 

“You know, where there is a will, there is a way. Take the camera and come man. We will find a way to manage the rest. It’s just a matter of time before you start hating yourself.”

“I have to put my family first and you know very well that I’m not in a position to pursue my dreams.”

“I know, but to be what you want to be, you will have to take risks.”

“Shinu, do you really want to be a photographer?”

“You know me right!!”

“I know you love what you do. But sometimes I get this feeling that you are struggling this hard, just to show her”

By 'her' he meant Aneesa and what he said wasn't something that never crossed my mind. On my worst days, what gave me the courage to fight more is the mere thought of her abandonment. But it wasn't just to show her, it was to make everyone realize, following passion isn't dumb. All this is not going to make any sense. So I just said,

“BK, I believe in what I can do and you know that I don’t like working under someone. I want my freedom and I want to make a change in this industry.

“You need to stop this and think practically dude.”

BK was always supportive of every decision I took in life and it was hard to see that reality did take a big toll on him.

Maybe I should. All this…I couldn't get his words out of my head and mom, who was already up when I reached home, noticed something is bothering me. Before she could dig deep, I declared that I'm tired and locked myself in my room. I wasn't in the mood to hear convincing stories about choosing 'living' over passion.